Terry Jones' Barbarians

Welcome to the other side of Roman history. The Romans gave us sophisticated road systems, chariots and the modern-day calendar. They also had to contend with barbarian hordes who continually threatened the peace, safety and prosperity of their Empire. Right? Maybe not. In this four-part BBC series, Monty Python alum Terry Jones travels throughout the geography of the Roman Empire and 700 years of history arguing that we have been sold a prejudiced history of Rome that has twisted our entire understanding of the Britons, Gauls, Vandals and Goths. A rare blend of scholarly research (as in Terry Jones’ Medieval Lives) combined with Jones’ witty approach makes this a must for history lovers as well as Monty Python fans.

Victims of a well-oiled propaganda machine, the Celts, Huns and Goths – among others – have endured thousands of years of misrepresentation. As Terry Jones reveals, the image of brutal savages hell-bent on nothing more than slaughter, pillage and rape, handed down to us by the Romans, is little more than a monumental exercise in ancient spin.

In an epic journey from the misty bogs of southern Ireland to the arid deserts of Persia, Jones exposes the depth of this Roman deception, bringing the fabulously rich and varied ‘barbarian’ cultures back to life; exploding myths and setting records straight wherever he goes. These ‘barbarians’ were the ‘bogeymen’ who stalked the dark corners of the Roman psyche, derided as “absolutely mad about war... otherwise simple”. But were they really that different from the Romans themselves? As one of the most dominant empires the world has ever known, the Romans wrote their own history. But recent archaeological evidence has revealed a completely different story to that of Roman propaganda.

The Celts wore beautiful clothes and jewellery; their society was complex and sophisticated; they made their own roads and calendar. Human rights, female freedom and flower arranging were all part and parcel of Persian society. The Goths used their knowledge of Roman military training and tactics to inflict a series of devastating defeats on Rome. And the Dacians – the now extinct indigenous people of what is modern day Romanian – were not only teetotal but they had their own unique religion. None of theses facts fit with how the Romans have led us to perceive these ‘barbarians’. It seems Rome’s mission to civilise the ancient world was little more than a cynical and well organised looting; that the ‘Glory of Rome’ was built with barbarian wealth, blood and sweat.

Is it time to re-write the history books?

Were the Romans the real barbarians?

The Primitive Celts - Julius Caesar wrote that he invaded Celtic Gaul in 58 BC to protect the Northern borders of the Empire from these volatile people. But Caesar's account was a smokescreen for a more sinister truth.
The Celts, according to Rome, were a warring and illiterate people. Yet Terry Jones discovers that the Celts had mathematical know-how way beyond Rome's. They had a society that was compassionate and protected the young and the weak. It was a society built on a sophisticated trading network that spread way beyond the borders of the Celtic world.
So why was Caesar so hell-bent on their destruction?
The Celtic world was built on vast deposits of gold and these "primitive people" were gold-miners par excellence. At the time of the conquest, the ambitious Caesar was broke. By his own account, he slaughtered over a million Celts and soon Rome was minting gold coins again.

The Savage Goths - According to Rome, the barbarians from Germany were among the most brutal of all. But when it came to brutality, it was not the Germans but the Romans who were the masters.
The Roman picture of the beasts from the dark forests of Germania was created in 9AD, when Herman the German masterminded the wholesale massacre of three Roman legions. Terry Jones discovers that Herman's real name was Armenius and that he was a high-ranking German officer in the Roman army, commanding legions of German soldiers. It seems the massacre was actually a rebellion against Roman occupation. Armenius knew precisely what the Roman military machine was capable of.
Modern tourists in Italy's capital are still dazzled by the achievements of Rome's Golden age - the aqueducts, forums and amphitheatres. Yet in the middle of Rome stands a monument to Roman brutality: Trajan's Column. The victims illustrated on the column were the barbarian peoples of Dacia. Ever heard of Dacia? It's unlikely, because the Romans so totally destroyed Dacia that its society is only just being rediscovered.
In a tunnel deep in a Transylvanian mountain, Terry discovers the reason Dacia was eradicated by Rome: massive deposits of gold. Rome took just five years to rip Dacia's gold from the rocks and exterminate its people.
Having destroyed a 'barbarian' civilisation, the Emperor Trajan set about totally rebuilding Rome. The glorious monuments to Rome's golden age were built with barbarian wealth and stained with Dacian blood.

The Brainy Barbarians - Terry Jones immerses himself in the world of the 'barbarians' of the East - the Greeks and the Persians - and discovers that it was they, and not the Romans, who were the real brains of the ancient world.
The story begins and ends with a strange lump of rusty metal discovered on the sea bed in the Mediterranean in 1900. It turned out to be a 2,000-year-old piece of highly complex engineering, the like of which would not be seen for another 1,500 years. What had happened to halt the progress of ancient know-how? The Romans had happened.
From the great Parthian Empires of the East to their closer neighbours, the Greeks, the Roman world was surrounded by mathematical and scientific brilliance. But Terry discovers that all the Romans were interested in was conquest and money. Tragically, in the single-minded quest to expand their Empire, the Romans buried scientific treasures and wonderfully enlightened societies that are only just coming to light.

The End of the World - Around 400AD, two 'barbarian' babies were born. One would grow up to become the fiercest barbarian of them all: Attila the Hun - the scourge of God. The other, Alaric, would become the leader of the greatest wreckers in history: the Vandals. The key to the success of the Romans' anti-barbarian propaganda is intimately wrapped up in the stories of the Huns and Vandals and the fall of the Western Empire.
When the Huns and the Vandals first burst across the borders of the Empire, it was profoundly different to the old pagan Empire. It was Christian. Legend has it that Attila's violent campaign against Rome was ended, not by a battle, but by the Pope. At the sight of the representative of the Christian God, we are told, the great pagan army turned away.
The Vandals, the Romans tell us, were responsible for delivering the final blow to the Western Empire when they tore out its heart: Rome. In an investigation that takes him from the great Hungarian plains to the ruins of North Africa, Terry discovers that the truth was somewhat different. The much-heralded victory of Pope Leo over Attila was in fact a humiliating surrender. The Vandals, already the architects of one of the most enlightened and artistic Empires ever seen, walked into Rome unopposed. It seems the Empire was already finished.
Yet somehow, from beyond the grave, the Roman Empire managed to turn humiliating defeat into a triumph and blacken the name of one of the most enlightened civilisations of the age. How? Terry reveals that the Empire didn't entirely disappear. One of its institutions thrived: The Catholic Church. Through the centuries, Catholic scribes have controlled the transmission of history and Roman history. Their version of history became our history and the ancestors of modern Europe became the barbarians.

“If only all history programmes were this good. Jones exudes a positively unnatural amount of boyish enthusiasm … and with his erudite mind he knows the difference between intelligent mainstream television and dumbing down. And rarely has ancient history had such a modern resonance. 'They make it a wilderness, call it peace,' was a Gaul's complaint against Caesar's campaign of occupation. With the slightest of winks, Jones reminds us of more recent wars that were waged in the name of freedom … Dry ancient history this ain't.” - Mail On Sunday

“Fascinating material, and Jones is a likeable and well-informed host.” - Independent On Sunday

“Astonishing stuff … when the material is this compelling, and the host this likeable, I for one will not complain.” - Independent On Sunday

“…entertaining new series … More than just a funny guy, the former Python Terry Jones is also an admirably accessible historian.” - Independent

“…Jones, the kind of engaging and easy-to-follow tutor that students might even get round to writing an essay for … Early on, actors reinforce our prejudices by wearing horned helmets and looking like a bit of soap wouldn't go amiss. But gradually we are taught to meet these ancient people eye to eye and appreciate them for wha they were - good eggs, generally, but wickedly slandered.” - Sunday Telegraph

“… enjoyably entertaining … [Terry Jones] always engaging…”- Daily Telegraph

“… utterly fascinating … entirely convincing … Terry Jones coud not be boring, even if he tried.”
- The Times

“Gripping.” - Daily Mirror

The word ‘barbarian’ is Greek in origin. It meant anyone who didn’t speak Greek. But the Romans used it differently to describe anyone who was not one of them – who wasn’t ‘Romanised’.